54 dairy

hurm...apakah yang brlaku padaku?

gahaha..

start ayat dah merepek..

i think what you done  is wrong..

berat pulak kepala nie..

hurmm...

keep thinking what u being doing here...

u not making it right...

u just making it worse..

i need time alone...

i need to focus on my final work..

please, jgan ggu kawan2 i...

im so sorry for causing u a lots of trouble by coming here..

i know that u being hoping to see me..

but im not ready for that...

im trying to give us a space..

so we can think more clearly what we have now..

i dont want to do stupid decision anymore..

im not saying that being with u is stupid..

i think we move to quickly in our relationship...

so i better make it slower now...

that's is the reason why i didnt wanna see u..

but u making me sick of myself..

if i pretending to be happy when u came here..

just let me finish my work..

i lt me settle my mind..

i dont what to think about us right now..

i wanna focus on my work..

i need to be good for my parents now..

i think i'll undrstand once u read this..

im so sorry!..i love you so much but i need time for my own good..

and for ur own good as well..

53 dairy

hurm...i should talk bout it in public..

but i need to..

i just dont get it...

why boys can do anything but girls dont!

aarrgghhh

its bullshit man!

what the fuck!

im trying to be as good as i am to u...

and i always give ur the chance to  make new friends...

i wont stop u..

its ur choice...

 

why do i have to do somethg i dont like...

hhuurrgg!

52 dairy

hurm..

w being in this situation like one week now..

so whats the conclusion for this..

im not really good at couples n undrstanding and give and take...

im a sensitive person when its comes to something painful...

its like so fuckin hurt right now!

i reallly hate this situation!

i really miss him but im quit happy with not to think about it...

i really spending time with friends..

making new friends...

how wonderful is the world..

when im all alone and just be myself and be happy all the time!

but the truth is..

i miss him so much and i really need him now..

will you just come and hug me...

just foe awhile...

like the song i used to hear...

hurm..

DADALI ur song makes me wanna cry! LOL

51 dairy

do you think will we survive till we get married?

this whole part of getting know each other

really take me down...

when there's happy its also hurt..

when its full of laughter also full will tears..

how can i be a part with him..

when the world keep holding him back..

its like im taking one step forward..

but im still 2 step behind everyone in his life...

can others feel happy watching us happy together..

it is so hard to do so?

can u just be happy for us?

im not perfect..

just let me be me..

im tired of being other person than me..

the 2 years back...

its really killing me..

im not who im...

world..

please dont make me change...

im sick and tired of it...